Friday, July 1, 2011

Om nom nom

I exercised twice this week. Then I ate cheesecake. Both times.

For a few weeks now I’ve been trying to cut back on the amount of sugary/fatty/deep fried food items that I consume. It hasn’t gone well. To bring about a major change in eating habits is a big thing to ask of someone who considers cake to be a reasonable breakfast choice and who writes poetry about the joy that is bacon. To be honest, I was surprised my motivation lasted until the second day.

I’ve attempted health kicks before, and they’ve all met the same end. I make all these big plans about how and when I’m going to exercise and what I’m going to eat each day. But then I remember that it’s not only easier, but also more enjoyable, to sit on the couch and eat chips.

The trouble with cutting back on junk food is that it’s so gosh darn tasty. If we were really supposed to eat vegetables, they’d taste edible. Instead, they taste like a combination of feet, arse and disappointment.

Getting up for work at 4am requires quite a lot of coffee consumption, and I refuse to drink skim milk because it doesn’t have that magical creamy taste. As for soy milk, well, that’s an abomination that the world needs to be rid of. My job also involves spending a lot of time around donuts and muffins and more donuts and a manager who shows up to work and excitedly says ‘I made brownies!’ before producing a container of brownies. Then offering me brownies. Brownies made of massive amounts of chocolate and sugar and butter. Brownies that are dusted with cocoa. Brownies that are delicious. Brownies.

My main issue with getting fit is that if I’m outside exercising, I’m not inside playing tetris, and that bothers me.

2 comments:

Unknown said...
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Unknown said...

No one says no to brownies. It's just not possible. They're like the Mafia of the desert world.